Humorous Wedding Speech by the Groom -- Wedding Toasts Roasts Speeches

Humorous Wedding Speech by the decorateThank you for your kind words, I am very proud to be your son-in-law I hope I can live up to your expectations. I would sincerely like to thank you for welcoming me into your family, for bringing up much(prenominal) a lovely daughter, and for giving me your blessing to marry her.In addition. imputable to the number of phone c all told in alls between my wife and her mom, the phone company would likewise like to thank you both.On this date in history in 1889 the Boer War ended, and maybe after my pitch youll deem its started again, although this day pass on go down in history as the day you all heard the best ever terminology. It will be postulate presently by one of my best men.It is said that a great speech has a good beginning, a good ending, and most importantly, the two be as close together as possible. (Have a thick vision of paper in hand)Well tough(Unfold discovers, pause, and smile at all tables)That, of course, was a cr acker of a speech of my own worked out for you today, plainly as I am now married, my wife has handed this to me to read instead. (To the father-in-law) By the way, I havent forgotten, Ill sign that receipt for you (Produce bit of paper with the constitution on saying)Received, one daughter in perfect condition, full- guaranteed. Care none gets bored easily keep busy with constant supply of chores. Comes fill out with all extras. (My favorites the nurses uniform).Not to be outdone though my dad also has a receipt for my wife to sign. It reads (Again, plait out anothier bit of paper)Received, one son, sold as seen, no refunds to a lower place any circumstances. Weve redecorated the room and changed the locks so youre stuck with him. Care Notes dehydrates easily, top up regularly with b... ...ccasion for both my parents who, as well as putting up with me and pointing me in the right direction, have prepared me well, supported me through my life and taught me the balanc e between right and wrong, so as that I know which I am enjoying at any given timeA last(a) and big thankyou goes to our bridesmaids who looked lovely and I thank them all for doing such a wonderful job today. (Give them gifts)(Toast bridesmaids)Ladies and Gentlemen, please stand. I would like to propose a toast to the bridesmaids.Well, I could stand here and give you a tear more stale old jokes. but instead I think Ill leave that to one of my best men who has cut his speech by quite a lot so as not to be Tottenhams first case of foot in mouth disease, safe remember hes never been one to let the truth get in the way of a good story. Ladies and gentlemen, the best man.